A poem: show me yours, I’ll show you mine.

Napoleon-dynamite-poem-dating-tinder-blog

I wanted to tell you something, I thought about writing a letter, But I know you think I’m boring, So I thought a poem might be better. Believe it or not, I haven’t written someone a poem before, Limirick, haiku, couplet or sonnet, Never – especially not for someone I now deplore, Before it turned sour, […]

Read More

Things women say to other women that they don’t really mean.

women-girls-relationships-snl-comedy

Women have this weird habit of saying things they don’t mean to other women. I can say this because I am a woman, and I often say things I don’t really mean to other women. I’m sure men do it too, like when they say, “go for it mate, she’s definitely interested”, or, “I mean, it’s […]

Read More

Babe in a back brace.

back-brace-mean-girls-hospital-gif

Now this is a story all about how my life got flipped-turned upside down, and I’d like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I’ll tell you how I can’t sit down for too long because I’m in excruciating and relentless pain. For the past five months or so, there’s been a bone […]

Read More

Am I having a nervous breakdown, or am I just being dramatic?

parks-recreation-breakdown-help-aubrey-plaza

Ah, that age old question I find myself asking daily; am I in the midst of a quarter-life crisis, or was I just being dramatic when I cried about the muesli I dropped on the kitchen floor? I hate clichés, they send a shiver down my spine. But one cliché seems so fitting right now: when […]

Read More

“I don’t like the crusts.”

krirsten-wiig-snl-dating-relationships-cougar-dating

I come from a conventional family; meet the wealthy love of your life by 23, provide your parents with grandchildren by 25, stay at home to create a haven for said husband and children, and when you can’t take the screaming brats any longer, get a part-time desk job at a soulless corporate firm. To […]

Read More

I got ghosted by a girl

ghosting-hiding-hide-ghost-dating-ryan-gosling

You’d exchanged GIFs on Tinder, the chat had moved to Whatsapp, you’d laughed over a bottle of cheap wine and handsily kissed goodbye in Soho. Your luck was changing, you could feel it. “Hey. How’s the head this morning? Last night was fun. We should do it again sometime.” Radio. Silence. Congratulations, you’ve just been ghosted. […]

Read More