I can’t get no sleep

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For the past two months, I’ve been suffering from a serious case of insomnia. No, not a sudden appreciation for the classic 90s tune, but a harrowing inability sleep. I really empathise with Maxi Jazz (note, I did just Google ‘Faithless lead singer’). No, I’m not dreaming of making mad love to my girl on […]

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My face is contagious.

This morning I awoke to a terrible sight. No, not the breast that had fallen out my pyjama top, but the sight of a big, angry cold sore, slap-bang in the middle of my top lip. Of course, it decided to rear its ugly head while I’m staying at my grandparent’s house – and although […]

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That time I ran away with a stranger.

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Three months ago, I met a stranger and ran away to Portugal with him for nine days. I had been single for four years – so single in fact, that I even attempted to make a career out of it (please see all blog posts pre-April 2017). I was like the Taylor Swift of the […]

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A thought.

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As I walked past the Royal Sovereign’s desolate carpark last Wednesday evening, I caught the gaze of an unfamiliar man, hunched over behind an industrial-sized bin. Wearing a dirtied grey tracksuit torn about the knees, it was clear he had little regard for the weight of societal expectation, nor the oppressiveness of personal belongings. His […]

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My femininity is failing me.

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As I cooked pasta and prepared a ready-made sauce last night, I realised I’m the worst example of an archetypal female that ever was. Last week I came home to buckets of homemade elderflower pressé brewing in my kitchen. My housemate is very talented; she’s a busy career woman, yet successfully keeps a menagerie of plants alive […]

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Mo’ money, mo’ problems.

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Staring into the empty eyes of my fellow passengers on the central line this morning, I could barely stop myself from retching. Mum – before you frantically call me asking when my last period was, I can tell you that this sickness is coming from a different place. This wave of all-consuming nausea comes from, […]

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