A poem: show me yours, I’ll show you mine.

Napoleon-dynamite-poem-dating-tinder-blog

I wanted to tell you something, I thought about writing a letter, But I know you think I’m boring, So I thought a poem might be better. Believe it or not, I haven’t written someone a poem before, Limirick, haiku, couplet or sonnet, Never – especially not for someone I now deplore, Before it turned sour, […]

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A letter to my family.

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Dear family, I have received your fervent, panicked and seemingly ceaseless communications regarding my marital status, and I feel it’s time to address your fears and concerns. Recently you may have been made aware of some unsettling news; it seems you were right to feel fear and concern, because it’s true, I don’t want to get […]

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Things women say to other women that they don’t really mean.

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Women have this weird habit of saying things they don’t mean to other women. I can say this because I am a woman, and I often say things I don’t really mean to other women. I’m sure men do it too, like when they say, “go for it mate, she’s definitely interested”, or, “I mean, it’s […]

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Babe in a back brace.

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Now this is a story all about how my life got flipped-turned upside down, and I’d like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I’ll tell you how I can’t sit down for too long because I’m in excruciating and relentless pain. For the past five months or so, there’s been a bone […]

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Am I having a nervous breakdown, or am I just being dramatic?

parks-recreation-breakdown-help-aubrey-plaza

Ah, that age old question I find myself asking daily; am I in the midst of a quarter-life crisis, or was I just being dramatic when I cried about the muesli I dropped on the kitchen floor? I hate clichés, they send a shiver down my spine. But one cliché seems so fitting right now: when […]

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Dating haikus

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Fleeting and often disappointing, haikus are much like my love life. Think of me like Sylvia Plath, but with Tinder.

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